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Not everyone will understand your journey. That’s fine. It’s not their journey to make sense of. It’s yours.

Zero Dean

Author | Photographer | CG Artist | Filmmaker

How to be a Superhero in Real Life (Part 3)

In this series:

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How to be a Superhero in Real Life (Part 3) by Zero Dean

  • Live a life you’re proud of
  • Be open to new ideas
  • Share your enthusiasm
  • Respect your body
  • Try new things
  • Focus on what you can do, not on what you can’t
  • Let go of what you can’t control
  • Be solution oriented, not problem focused
  • Don’t let others dictate your sense of worth
  • Strive for progress, not perfection
  • Don’t be afraid of failing, be afraid of not trying
  • Focus on what you have, not on what you don’t
  • Forgive yourself & others
  • Let go of your emotional baggage
  • Act with confidence
  • Admit when you are wrong
  • Put things back where they belong
  • Spread hope
  • Make peace
  • Generate joy

Every day.

Related:

There is a lesson in this

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Never forget that whatever you focus on only grows stronger — or that contrast is good.

Because shit happens and life isn’t always easy — and if you focus on it, it may be all you see, but there’s always so much more to the world than that.

And sometimes we need these experiences to help us see — or remind us of — this fact.

When things aren’t going well, it might just mean you’re in the process of learning or being reminded of something important.

Whenever life presents you with a challenge, remind yourself, “There is a lesson in this.” and realize that it will likely not become evident until after the experience has passed. Because most of life’s lessons are not labeled as lessons until one has learned what they’ve had to teach.

Whenever you face something challenging, remind yourself, "There is a lesson in this." -- and realize that it will likely not become evident until after the experience has passed. Because most of life's lessons are not labeled as such until after you've learned what they've had to teach.

2:10 PM
I’ve been sitting in my car in the gym parking lot for over an hour with my laptop plugged in while also listening to the car stereo.

I go to start my car, but the battery is dead. I drained it (as I have been known to do).

2:15 PM
I am standing in the gym parking lot next to my car while holding jumper cables. I feel fortunate this happened in this location because there is a lot of pedestrian and vehicle traffic.

2:30 PM
I have been standing in the parking lot holding jumper cables for over 10 minutes while people drive or walk by without making eye contact. Some pass as close as 10 feet away, but it is obvious people are too busy or too absorbed in their own lives to help.

I’m beginning to wonder how long I will wait. And I admit, I begin to think there is a problem with the people here. I don’t see kindness in the people passing.

In contrast, both times this happened while I was staying somewhere else last year, the first people to see me were also the first to offer to help.

Today, this is far from the case — and, if I’m frank, I’m not only not feeling particularly good about the people in this area, I’m having doubts about the human race.

Me, the optimist, I’ve let this experience get to me.

It happens.

2:35 PM
An older Latina woman walks to her car 3 spaces from mine and gets in — at first I think she’s going to drive away, but she rolls down her window and asks if I could use some help.

Her smile is infectious.

2:40 PM
My car is started.

The whole jump starting process took less than 4 minutes — most of that time taken up explaining how to jumpstart a car, as the woman insisted I teach her.

We part ways smiling.

“THANK YOU.”

2:50 PM
I arrive at the local cafe I like to work at. I grab my laptop bag from my car, but cannot locate my new coffee travel mug. I think I left it here last night.

Oh well. That sucks.

2:52 PM
I walk into the cafe. All the tables near outlets are taken.

I set down my laptop bag at one of the tables that are free.

The kind older couple that I’ve mentioned before see me and wave me over.

Although they are in the middle of drinking their coffee, they insist I take the table they are sitting at — which has an outlet.

“THANK YOU.”

It’s nice there are people like this in the world.

2:53 PM
I’m in the process of setting up my laptop when one of the staff walks over and puts my travel mug down on the table.

“We found this last night.”
“THANK YOU.”

3:00 PM
After cleaning out my travel mug, I walk up to the cashier to get coffee.

“Just the coffee?”
“Yup.”
“You can just go ahead,” he says, pointing at the coffee, “It’s on us today.”
I smile, “THANK YOU.”

And as I take my first sip of coffee, I am reminded that all these acts of kindness just happened in the same place I was ready to give up on minutes earlier.

And I realize there is a lesson in this.

How to be a Superhero in Real Life (Part 2)

In this series:

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How to be a Superhero in Real Life (Part 2) by Zero Dean

  • Be patient with people
  • Lead by example
  • Be tolerant of others
  • Live with a purpose in mind
  • Treat people well, regardless of how you feel
  • Take personal responsibility for your actions & your life
  • Honor your commitments
  • Be brave
  • Appreciate differences
  • Be reliable
  • Be someone you respect and admire
  • Share
  • Let your actions be congruent with your words
  • Live without prejudice
  • Act as if what you do makes a difference
  • Be polite
  • Inspire others
  • Be humble
  • Honor your relationships
  • Be compassionate

Every day.

Related:

How to be a Superhero in Real Life (Part 1)

In this series:

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How to be a Superhero in Real Life (Part 1) by Zero Dean

  • Encourage others
  • Be the change you wish to see
  • Give without expectation
  • Observe without judging
  • Be authentic & genuine
  • Clean up your own messes
  • Be upfront & honest
  • Give thanks & be sincere
  • Be kind
  • Appreciate without comparing
  • Live with intention
  • Take the time to truly listen to people
  • Pursue excellence
  • Strive to add value wherever you may be
  • Smile sincerely & generously
  • Offer to help without waiting to be asked
  • Treat people with respect & dignity
  • Do what you know is right, even when no one is watching
  • Keep your word
  • Live with integrity & honor

Every day.

Related:

Busy is easy.

Don’t fool yourself into thinking that being busy or having a full schedule is the same thing as living life to the fullest. It’s not.

Being busy is easy.

Prioritizing your time in a way that allows you maximize your experiences and truly enrich your life and allow for personal growth is not.

Having a full schedule is not the same thing as living life to the fullest. It’s not even close.

What you spend your time doing matters.

Intention matters.

Being busy is not the same thing as living life to the fullest. It&039;s not even close.

Related:

“It’s too late.”

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Most people use the phrases “It’s too late”, “I’m too old.”, “It’s been done.”, “I already know what the answer will be.” or “Why even bother.” as an excuse to give up without ever putting in any effort to see if they are mistaken.

It is a disservice to your life to imagine your limits without ever making an attempt to see where they truly are. The vast majority of people on the planet are capable of achieving far more than they let themselves believe.

You’ll never get a “yes” if you never ask. You won’t get the job if you don’t apply. You can’t win if you don’t play. And you’ll never do great things unless you make the effort and try.

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Talking shit

No one has ever made himself great by showing how small someone else is.” — Irvin Himmel

With our limited perspectives, we often have very little understanding of what other people are truly thinking or what motivated them to act in the way that they did. We only have our interpretation.

Remember, we judge ourselves by our intentions, but we judge others by their actions.

“Regardless of whether the outcome of an action is considered “good” or “bad”, everyone does things for reasons they consider reasonable at the time.”

As such, it is important to exercise restraint when one feels the urge to criticize people.

Remember, what one says when they talk about other people reveals a considerable amount about the person doing the talking.

If you must talk about people, talk about what you learned from the experience and use that to teach others how to beware of similar situations.

Let others make up their own mind as to how to use the knowledge and insight you share.

What you observe with other people isn’t always true. But what you learn from experiences with other people can’t be disputed.

We all make mistakes. It’s what we learn from ours and others experiences that’s important, not energy spent criticizing others.

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” — Ian Maclaren *

*This is in regard to personal relationships, not evil companies or individuals who exist to simply take advantage of people.

Related:

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What you say when you talk about others says a lot about you.

Change your priorities and you change your life.

Excerpt from:

Change your priorities and you change your life. It’s that simple. (But it isn’t easy)

Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” — Confucius

Related:

Change your priorities and you change your life. It's that simple.

Expiration date

To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.” — Oscar Wilde

Are there things you want to do in life? Fears you want to overcome?

Would it change your approach knowing you only had a year to live?

We may not ever know our exact expiration date, but we all have one. And for some of us, it’s closer than we think. This isn’t a pessimistic way of looking at things, it’s a fact. But it’s something we often choose to ignore until it’s too late.

If you truly intend to live life to the fullest , I think it’s vitally important to remind yourself every once in a while — if not daily — that you’re dying.

It may not be the sort of thing you generally find yourself wanting to think about, but by refusing to face this fact, we run the risk of wasting enormous amounts of time getting caught up in things that ultimately provide us with very little value or substance in our lives.

There are more things to do and places to see in the world than any single person could possibly do in a lifetime. So already, our lives and what we choose to experience is a compromise.

A typical lifetime may seem like a lot of time, but time passes faster than one thinks. Adding to this is the fact that we are only teenagers briefly. We will only be in our 20’s once. Our 30’s once. Our 40’s and so on, ONCE.

To think you have time to put everything off to see and do and appreciate until later in life is an illusion.

And then there’s the fact that we only get one body. And it has to last a lifetime. If that’s not an incentive to stay healthy and treat your body well, I don’t know what is. But hey, if you’re not fit or healthy, it’s not too late to try to be.

We get a brain, which we can fill with any number of amazing facts and memories of real-life experiences and not just what we watched on TV. But the brain is like a muscle, the less we use it, the less efficient it becomes.

The fact is, every single day that passes is a day of our life we are trading for it. And we’ll never get it back. You can never get more time, you can only manage it more effectively by living with intention.

This is not to suggest that anyone should act irresponsibly, spend money they don’t have, or live with reckless abandon.

Reminding yourself that every day has value and every day that passes is another day closer to your expiration date can provide the perspective & motivation necessary to help you prioritize your life in a way that reflects the kind of person you truly want to be.

“Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything – all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.” — Steve Jobs

Related:

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Your life is a Do It Yourself project.

Your life is a Do It Yourself project.

Your life is a Do It Yourself project.

But if you’re lucky and you’re kind, you might just find a few people who will be more than willing to help you along the way.

Because you would do the same for them.

Related:

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