Search

Not everyone will understand your journey. That’s fine. It’s not their journey to make sense of. It’s yours.

Zero Dean

Author | Photographer | CG Artist | Filmmaker

Confidence and criticism

Caring is cool

by

Let 2020 begin a decade where we do away with glorifying “zero f*cks” and IDGAF culture.

Lack of caring isn’t cool, it isn’t brave, and it certainly isn’t strong. You know what’s cool? Being brave enough & strong enough to care about things without giving the feedback you get a direct line to your ego.

Feedback from life experience – especially criticism – is an absolutely essential part of personal growth. You can care about what people think without letting it impact your sense of self-worth – even when someone insults you.

Not all of the feedback you get from others is about you. In fact, in many cases, negative feedback has more to do with the person giving it than the person it’s intended for. But if you’re not brave or strong enough to consider it, you’ll never know – and you’ll never grow from it either.

The worst thing about negative feedback is when it’s true. Which is also the best thing about it, because it provides information one can grow from.

When negative feedback is false, misinformed, or isn’t applicable, then there’s no point in feeling bad about it for precisely these reasons.

I’ve been saying it since 2013, it isn’t people who don’t care that make a positive difference in the world – it’s people who do. Be proud of being someone who does.

Related:

There’s no one way

by

There’s no one way to reach people that is both effective and makes everyone happy. There’s no one way to teach a lesson. There’s no one way to try to make a positive difference in someone’s life.

What one person finds annoying, preachy, or heavy-handed, another is thankful for. What one person considers common sense, another is contemplating for the first time.

Just because some people don’t appreciate your efforts doesn’t diminish the fact that others do.

Just because your attempts at making a positive difference in the world are not appreciated by everyone doesn’t mean that you should stop trying.

Superficial vs substance

by

There will always be people who see the value in your contributions to the world and who genuinely appreciate you for what you’ve done and the kind of person you are.

But by that same token, there will always be those who ignore substance and, instead, judge you based on something superficial, like what you own or how you transport yourself from one location to another.

Always keep in mind that it is not your job to convince people to see substance when all they want to look at is the superficial.

Be the best you that you can be and you will naturally attract those who see value in who you are and what you offer. Don’t waste time trying to get people who overly value superficial things to see your worth. If they ever do, it wont be because you convinced them to.

Originally published on: Dec 31, 2019

It is not your job to make people like you

by

Anyone can fake being “normal”. Anyone can try to please everyone and turn off no one. Anyone can constantly concern themselves with what other people think of them or how they are perceived. These things are not only incredibly common behaviors, they’re dangerous.

Because – if you’re constantly checking in with regard to what “normal” is or only permitting yourself to do what other people expect of you, you’re not only not being true to yourself, you’re letting your fears dictate your life by acting a certain way in order to earn affection or gain favor.

No matter how much you may want to be liked, pretending to be something you’re not isn’t the answer – because you’re not here to be someone else – you’re here to be you. And – if you are not living your life being the best YOU that you can be, you’re not really living authentically. And you are certainly not living up to your unique potential.

While you may not please everyone who crosses your path in life, one person you can consistently please is yourself – but only if you don’t give in to your fears and sacrifice who you truly are in order to constantly accommodate the expectations of others.

Be the best person that you can be – while being true to yourself – and you will naturally attract people who appreciate you for who you are, not someone you pretend to be.

To pretend to be someone you’re not in order to gain favor or followers is to put yourself on a path that will ultimately let people down – most importantly yourself. It has often been said that the number 1 regret of the dying is that they didn’t have the courage to live a life that was true to who they were because they spent so much of their time concerned with what other people might think.

If you want to live an authentic life, stop worrying so much about being liked. It is not your responsibility to make people like you nor is it your job to conform yourself to other people’s expectations. You are here to be the best YOU that you can be – whether other people like you or not.

If you want to reach your full potential

by

Excerpt from: Likability. Being liked and unliked.

If you want to self-actualize (reach your fullest potential), then you must learn to accept yourself for who you are & who you want to be and take personal responsibility for your life and how you feel.

And along the way to self-actualization, you must be prepared to be unpopular. Don’t leave your sense of worth and well-being in the hands of others.

Those who achieve greatness in life don’t let others dictate how they feel about themselves — and neither should you.

It isn’t criticism that holds you back — it’s you.

by

Many times, how you think about the things holding you back hold you back more than the things themselves. For example: criticism.

It isn’t criticism that holds you back, it’s how you choose to think & react to it that does. Always remember that how you choose to respond to criticism and negativity is a choice.

Ignoring criticism is an option that too few people take advantage of. The more that you consciously disconnect yourself from modes of thinking that hold you back, the more you free yourself to move forward unhindered.

If you’re weird, own that shit

by

If you’re weird, own that shit. You don’t have to be ashamed or embarrassed by it. In a world full of people doing their best to fit in, you don’t – and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that.

But if you don’t own your weirdness – or you allow yourself to be embarrassed by it – people who prefer the ordinary will often find ways to make you feel like a lesser person because of it.

The fact is, the things that make you unique – even if they’re weird – can be a source of great satisfaction & immense personal power in your life – but only if you fully accept them and refuse to see the things that make you stand out as flaws.

When you learn to use your uniqueness as a source of power instead of weakness, your whole world can change. Because another word for weird is remarkable. And the world is drawn to remarkable things.

Many people use the term “weird” as if it’s a bad thing, but it’s really not. Anyone can try to fit in – and many people spend their entire lives making sure they do – but the fact is, there’s nothing remarkable about conforming to a crowd.

+ More
zero-dean-logo-600
Search
Instagram Twitter Youtube Pinterest Amazon Reddit Soundcloud