“It’s just a joke”

Allowing yourself to be the subject of a joke every now and then can show that you don’t take things too seriously. Allowing yourself to become the brunt of jokes regularly can show you don’t take things seriously enough.

Every time you allow someone to disrespect you — even if it’s “just a joke” — you give them permission to do it again.

If you want respect, it’s important to set boundaries.

Friendly ribbing between genuine friends can be a sign of trust and affection, but being frequently showcased as a joke to an audience — particularly people who don’t know you

"It's just a joke" that well — is something else.

When is enough enough? When people are laughing and you’re not one of them.

 

The confidence, happiness & success show

If you really love yourself, you don’t have to make a show of how much you love yourself. This also applies to confidence, success & happiness.

Some of the most insecure people on the planet are standing in a spotlight hoping you won’t notice that they’re the one holding it.

When what you are & how you feel is genuine, you don’t have to make a show of it because authenticity is effortless and is evident by how you act & carry yourself.

When you truly are what you are, how you act & your way of being is an effortless extension of the truth.

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The confidence, happiness & success show

The confidence, happiness & success show

Staying true to you

People who don’t know you will often — and innocently — view and treat you like someone you’re not. It’s not your responsibility to conform to their vision. Having integrity means staying true to you, not conforming to other people’s expectations because it keeps them comfortable.

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Staying true to you

Caring is cool

Caring is cool

Let 2020 begin a decade where we do away with glorifying “zero f*cks” and IDGAF culture.

Lack of caring isn’t cool, it isn’t brave, and it certainly isn’t strong. You know what’s cool? Being brave enough & strong enough to care about things without giving the feedback you get a direct line to your ego.

Feedback from life experience – especially criticism – is an absolutely essential part of personal growth. You can care about what people think without letting it impact your sense of self-worth – even when someone insults you.

Not all of the feedback you get from others is about you. In fact, in many cases, negative feedback has more to do with the person giving it than the person it’s intended for. But if you’re not brave or strong enough to consider it, you’ll never know – and you’ll never grow from it either.

The worst thing about negative feedback is when it’s true. Which is also the best thing about it, because it provides information one can grow from.

When negative feedback is false, misinformed, or isn’t applicable, then there’s no point in feeling bad about it for precisely these reasons.

I’ve been saying it since 2013, it isn’t people who don’t care that make a positive difference in the world – it’s people who do. Be proud of being someone who does.

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There’s no one way

There's no one way

There’s no one way to reach people that is both effective and makes everyone happy. There’s no one way to teach a lesson. There’s no one way to try to make a positive difference in someone’s life.

What one person finds annoying, preachy, or heavy-handed, another is thankful for. What one person considers common sense, another is contemplating for the first time.

Just because some people don’t appreciate your efforts doesn’t diminish the fact that others do.

Just because your attempts at making a positive difference in the world are not appreciated by everyone doesn’t mean that you should stop trying.

Superficial vs substance

Superficial vs substance

There will always be people who see the value in your contributions to the world and who genuinely appreciate you for what you’ve done and the kind of person you are.

But by that same token, there will always be those who ignore substance and, instead, judge you based on something superficial, like what you own or how you transport yourself from one location to another.

Always keep in mind that it is not your job to convince people to see substance when all they want to look at is the superficial.

Be the best you that you can be and you will naturally attract those who see value in who you are and what you offer. Don’t waste time trying to get people who overly value superficial things to see your worth. If they ever do, it wont be because you convinced them to.

It is not your job to make people like you

It is not your job to make people like you

It is not your job to make people like you

Anyone can fake being “normal”. Anyone can try to please everyone and turn off no one. Anyone can constantly concern themselves with what other people think of them or how they are perceived. These things are not only incredibly common behaviors, they’re dangerous.

Because – if you’re constantly checking in with regard to what “normal” is or only permitting yourself to do what other people expect of you, you’re not only not being true to yourself, you’re letting your fears dictate your life by acting a certain way in order to earn affection or gain favor.

No matter how much you may want to be liked, pretending to be something you’re not isn’t the answer – because you’re not here to be someone else – you’re here to be you. And – if you are not living your life being the best YOU that you can be, you’re not really living authentically. And you are certainly not living up to your unique potential.

While you may not please everyone who crosses your path in life, one person you can consistently please is yourself – but only if you don’t give in to your fears and sacrifice who you truly are in order to constantly accommodate the expectations of others.

Be the best person that you can be – while being true to yourself – and you will naturally attract people who appreciate you for who you are, not someone you pretend to be.

To pretend to be someone you’re not in order to gain favor or followers is to put yourself on a path that will ultimately let people down – most importantly yourself. It has often been said that the number 1 regret of the dying is that they didn’t have the courage to live a life that was true to who they were because they spent so much of their time concerned with what other people might think.

If you want to live an authentic life, stop worrying so much about being liked. It is not your responsibility to make people like you nor is it your job to conform yourself to other people’s expectations. You are here to be the best YOU that you can be – whether other people like you or not.