Personal goals Archives - Page 7 of 12

Self-discipline is a key to many doors

August 10, 2015 by Zero Dean

Excerpt from: The strength in tolerance and kindness

Self-discipline is a key to many doors. Not least of which is one that leads to a better, stronger, and healthier version of yourself.

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The strength in tolerance and kindness

August 2, 2015 by Zero Dean

There’s nothing wimpy or weak about being kind or tolerant of others.

Quite the opposite, really.

Patience and tolerance are often indicative of self-control.

Reflexive anger, hate, and aggression — on the other hand — represent a lack of self-control and often lead one to undesirable consequences.

In the hands of someone with mental discipline, the unrestrained anger and aggression of others can often be used against them.

If you can’t control yourself — the one and only person you truly have any control over — you may appear strong in the moment, but it isn’t real power, it’s weakness.

Self-discipline is a key to many doors. Not least of which is one that leads to a better, stronger, and healthier version of yourself.

If the results of your habits don’t make you a better, stronger, or healthier person, it’s time to consider new habits that do.

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Setbacks and self-doubt

December 1, 2019July 19, 2015 by Zero Dean

If you create goals with confidence, but sometimes suffer from self-doubt, realize that it’s a sign that you’re on the right track, not the wrong one.

Because if your aspirations don’t push you beyond your comfort zone, you’re not aiming high enough.

The most worthwhile goals in your life will be mountains, not molehills. They will not only force you to face challenges you expect, they’ll force you overcome obstacles you couldn’t anticipate when you started.

It’s not the challenges we expect on a journey that force us to face self-doubt as much as it’s those we never see coming. Learn to expect the unexpected and don’t be deterred by it.

Whenever self-doubt strikes on your journey, remind yourself why you started and focus not on how far you are from your goal, but instead on how far you’ve come.

Focus on your progress and your victories, no matter how small. Focus on the knowledge you’ve gained on your journey and all the new insights you can convert into wisdom.

Accept setbacks and self-doubt as part of your journey and refuse to let them deter you from the greatness you know is within you.

Remember that you didn’t pick your goals because you knew they would be easy, you picked them knowing they were hard but worthwhile.

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The road to success

June 21, 2015 by Zero Dean

“When your determination changes, everything will begin to move in the direction you desire. The moment you resolve to be victorious, every nerve and fiber in your being will immediately orient itself toward your success. On the other hand, if you think, ‘This is never going to work out,’ then at that instant every cell in your being will be deflated and give up the fight.” — Daisaku Ikeda

In order to succeed at any goal worth achieving, one must not only be prepared to face fear, challenges, hardships, and failure, one must be willing to overcome each of these things repeatedly.

It isn’t enough to simply try and fail and try again. One must build the tenacity necessary to keep trying long after one’s expectations of success have been challenged beyond imagining.

From the limited perspective one has at the onset of any journey, the pathway to one’s ultimate destination is often far less clear than it’s imagined to be — with a potential “plot twist” lying in wait at every turn.

As such, it’s important to remember that failures and setbacks are as much a part of the process of success as small victories are along the way. And that the road to success is often revealed most by the lessons learned from failed attempts to navigate it without a map.

Every failure in life provides valuable experience that, in turn, can provide illumination on one’s journey. But to reap the most from that experience, it’s important to not allow our failures to discourage us from pushing forward towards our goals.

As the Chinese proverb goes, “The temptation to quit will be greatest just before you are about to succeed.”

In other words, never underestimate the power of persistence.

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If not now, when?

June 3, 2015 by Zero Dean

If you don’t take steps to overcome your shyness, procrastination, bad habits, or any other thing that may lead to issues in your life, when are you going to?

If you don’t get on the path to living a healthier lifestyle soon, when will you?

If you don’t make concrete plans to do the awesome things you’ve always wanted to do, when will they get done?

If you don’t develop the discipline necessary to follow through with your New Year’s resolutions year after year, will you ever?

The fact is, people often put things off until it’s too late. We fall victim to the belief that there will always be time.

But time passes. It never stops.

Days, weeks, months, even years go by without people taking action on the things they intended to do.

One only gets to experience what it’s like to be and do things at a certain age when one is that age.

You’ll only be young once. You’ll only be in your twenties, thirties, forties… once. And in every decade that passes, you are no longer the same. Lifestyles, responsibilities, priorities change.

Of all the things we get in life, we can never get more time.

If you want to accomplish anything in life, you can’t just think about it. And you can’t just keeping pushing it off until the time is right or everything is perfect.

You have to commit to taking action on whatever it is you truly wish to do.

Commit to writing down what you truly want to do in life. Commit to taking the steps necessary to figure out how to do it. Break down every aspect of what you wish to accomplish into achievable goals. And then commit to meeting them.

Make it happen.

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Motivation & achievement

April 29, 2015 by Zero Dean

It has been said that discipline is just choosing between what you want now and what you want most. But knowing what you truly want and why you want it can be as important as the discipline necessary to attain it.

Without a genuine internal desire to accomplish a very specific “something”, it can not only be difficult to do what is necessary meet a goal, it can be difficult to simply find the motivation to get started.

While motivation from external sources such as inspirational quotes, self-help books, or motivational speakers may temporarily set fire to our desire to achieve, these fires are often quick to burn out.

Zig Ziglar said, “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing — that’s why we recommend it daily.”

This is a clever saying, but it’s more of a crutch for motivation than an elegant long-lasting solution.

As I’ve said before…

“You can read a million motivational sayings to pump yourself up — or echo them to others until you’re blue in the face — but that won’t change anything unless you take action and consistently change your behavior.”

This isn’t to say there is anything wrong with using external motivation as a tool. It works. But the size of the self-help industry is an indication that external motivation doesn’t last.

When one’s motivation is dependent on external sources, the moment those sources are absent is the moment one’s motivation begins to fade. This is because motivation is a state of mind.

And if a particular state of one’s mind is dependent on the availability of things it doesn’t always have control over, it can be difficult to attain the state of mind associated with those things when they’re unavailable.

This is why it’s important to learn how to develop the mental discipline necessary to be one’s own source of motivation.

“Motivation is a fire from within. If someone else tries to light that fire under you, chances are it will burn very briefly.” — Stephen R. Covey

When one is able to motivate themselves, they light a kind of fire that can burn indefinitely. And for these kinds of fires to be set alight, one must know what they want and why they want it — even if what one wants is to simply to seek pleasure from something or the satisfaction of accomplishment.

It has been said that 90 percent of success is showing up. I disagree.

I’d say, the largest contributor to success is knowing exactly what you want. The next largest is having the proper motivation to achieve it. And the remaining amount, roughly 20 percent, is doing what is necessary to get results.

(This also complements The Pareto principle (also known as the 80–20 rule) which states that, in most endeavors, roughly 20% of the work produces 80% of the results.)

Along the way to achieving whatever it is you desire, make sure your mindset is conducive to creating positive thought processes that reinforce your efforts.

Because until one changes the way they think, they will continue to follow familiar patterns in life. An example of this is when people start new endeavors with enthusiasm (or make New Year’s resolutions), but then fail to find the motivation necessary to follow through after obstacles arise.

The fire you light within yourself must not only burn hot enough to stay alight during turbulent times, it mustn’t be dependent on things you have no control over.

“Wanting something is not enough. You must hunger for it. Your motivation must be absolutely compelling in order to overcome the obstacles that will invariably come your way.” — Les Brown

Create and maintain your own motivation by having a clear understanding of what you want and why you want it and then reinforce your positive thought process to achieve it until it becomes not just a habit, but a way of life.

“Everything you want should be yours: the type of work you want; the relationships you need; the social, mental, and aesthetic stimulation that will make you happy and fulfilled; the money you require for the lifestyle that is appropriate to you; and any requirement that you may (or may not) have for achievement or service to others. If you don’t aim for it all, you’ll never get it all. To aim for it requires that you know what you want.” — Richard Koch

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Self-discipline

September 29, 2020March 30, 2015 by Zero Dean

“Greater in battle than the man who would conquer a thousand-thousand men, is he who would conquer just one — himself. Better to conquer yourself than others.When you’ve trained yourself, living in constant self-control, neither a deva nor gandhabba, nor a Mara banded with Brahmas, could turn that triumph back into defeat.” — Buddha

Your ability to listen to and take action based on your inner voice — regardless of how you feel, other influences, or temptations you face — is the key to self-mastery.

When you increase (or decrease) your discipline in one area, it increases (or decreases) your discipline in all areas that require self-control.

Like a muscle, the more you exercise self-control on a consistent basis, the stronger you get. As your self-control increases, the more you gain the ability to direct your life in a manner that is congruent with the true you. The more congruent your actions are with your thoughts and feelings, the better you feel about yourself and the decisions you make. Every time you feel good about a decision you make, it raises your self-esteem and your self-confidence. You also reinforce in your mind what you are capable of and it makes it less difficult to make similar decisions in life.

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Are you awake?

March 21, 2015 by Zero Dean

Far too many people drift through life waiting for “the good stuff”. They choose a career or a path in life with the expectation that that path will bring them something they seek — perhaps happiness. And if it doesn’t come — or they find themselves conflicted because they feel as if they chose poorly — they think, “Well, this is the path I chose, there’s no changing it now.”

But this is a self-limiting belief. There is no rule that says you cannot correct the course you’re on.

If you want to makes changes to improve yourself as a person, you can. And if you want to take action to change the trajectory of your life, you can do that, too.

You don’t have to sit back and watch your life pass you by thinking, “If only…” and regretting all the things you could’ve done, but chose not to.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” — Mark Twain

Remember: “Living life to the fullest means continually reaching out for newer, richer, deeper, life-changing experiences. It means using those experiences as a means for personal growth and pushing the boundaries of yourself mentally, spirituality, and intellectually for the betterment of yourself and the world at large.

Living life to the fullest means taking an active role in your own development. It means steering the rudder of your own life and taking advantage of your unique and powerful potential as a person.”

If you don’t like where you are in life or some aspect about yourself, you can take steps to change that. And if it sounds a little scary, there’s a pretty good chance that you’re on the right path. “Dealing with discomfort, fear, and situations we don’t want be in — or situations that we are completely unfamiliar with — is an absolutely essential part of growth.”

This is your life. Here. Today. Right now. Your life is in progress. Every day that passes is another day closer to your expiration date.

What you aim for and where you go in life as a result of striving to meet your goals is up to you.

“Everything you want should be yours: the type of work you want; the relationships you need; the social, mental, and aesthetic stimulation that will make you happy and fulfilled; the money you require for the lifestyle that is appropriate to you; and any requirement that you may (or may not) have for achievement or service to others. If you don’t aim for it all, you’ll never get it all. To aim for it requires that you know what you want.” — Richard Koch

If you want to make changes to yourself or your life, you can choose to make changes. But to do so means you have to be proactive and awake, not passive or asleep at the wheel.

So… are you awake?

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Supplemental: Image from: Kaiji (manga)

Life happens.

February 19, 2015 by Zero Dean

Life happens.

Sometimes it’s good.
Sometimes it’s bad.

And sometimes it dumps a pile of shit in your path.

What matters is not whether it’s fair (it often isn’t).
What matters is how one chooses to deal with it.

We can spend time complaining.
We can spend time pointing the finger.
We can spend time blaming others for the situations we find ourselves in.
And we can learn to identify as a victim of the unfairness of life.

Or we can take personal responsibility for our lives and use our ability to seek out more favorable options (including how to cope) and move on.

Every single person on the planet is forced to deal with hardship and misfortune at one time or another.

Sometimes it’s because we make bad decisions.
Sometimes it’s because we tolerate things far longer than we should.
Sometimes it’s because we’re in the wrong place at the wrong time.
And sometimes we are simply thrust into things we don’t want to be a part of.

But that’s life.
It happens to everyone at one time or another.

You don’t improve your life by complaining about the one you have.
You don’t improve your life by refusing to take personal responsibility for it.

You improve your life by taking steps to change it for the better.

It can be a lot of work — and it may require some sacrifices — but taking personal responsibility for one’s life and taking steps to change it is far more effective than staying where one is, doing nothing, and complaining about the view.

The fact is, our lives are a direct reflection of our priorities.

Want to be healthier? Focus on your health.
Want to be smarter? Focus on your education.
Want to be a better person? Focus on self-improvement.
Want to be more resilient? Challenge yourself.
Want to get over your fears? Face them.

If we don’t like where we are in life, we can change that. But complaining about it won’t do it. And blaming others won’t do it either.

Want a better life? Work for it.

Change your priorities and you change your life.

No one else is going to do it for you.

“Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but of playing a poor hand well.” — Robert Louis Stevenson

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The master of your destiny

August 31, 2014 by Zero Dean

People often know exactly what they need to do to get the results they want, but fail to start because they don’t want to put in the work or subject themselves to the discomfort necessary to get from where they are to where they want to be.

Don’t fall victim to your brain telling you that it doesn’t want to do something — that could benefit you or others — because it is challenging or uncomfortable.

Most things you think are difficult to do at the beginning get easier with repetition. Not because the task gets easier, but because you get better at it. Stronger.

Every challenge you face and overcome today helps provide you with the strength & knowledge necessary to overcome the challenges you face tomorrow.

You have it within you to be the master of your destiny by resolving to bravely face the challenges necessary to get the positive results you want in life.

But you must stop trying to cheat your way through life by looking — or waiting indefinitely — for the magic pill or shortcut that never comes.

Do what is necessary to get the results you desire, and the discomfort you feel at the beginning of your journey will greatly diminish — or go away completely — if you commit yourself to getting through it without giving up.

Don’t sacrifice the kind of life and health you truly desire by catering to your short-term comfort over your long-term goals.

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