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Not everyone will understand your journey. That’s fine. It’s not their journey to make sense of. It’s yours.

Zero Dean

Author | Photographer | CG Artist | Filmmaker

The right thing to do

Yes, you will sometimes feel like putting in the effort to make a positive difference isn’t necessarily worth it.

And not everyone cares about the things you care about.

And sometimes you will feel like you are the only one that something actually matters to.

But you’re not.

Never let a lack of recognition of your efforts to make a positive difference get in the way of doing what you feel is right.

Because sometimes, the most effective thing you can do is simply set a good example.

The people who make a positive difference in the world are the ones who keep trying to.

Not for fame. Or recognition. Or personal benefit.

But because it’s the right thing to do.

Related:

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From the comments:

Stephen: Hard not to internalize those with issues who smirk and roll their eyes.

Zero: Agreed. It’s a struggle. Group social dynamics are very powerful.

But I think it’s important to not lose your identity in a crowd — or to the crowd — because you are afraid of standing out.

See also: Why Good People Do Bad Things : Research indicates that being in a group makes some people lose touch with their personal moral beliefs.

Lanes Merge Ahead

“Yes, I see the “lanes merge ahead” signs, but I’m really in a hurry today. Besides, I see those other jerks do this all the time.”

“I know the light is turning red, but I have important things to do.”

“I can’t find a trash can and I’m really tired of carrying this bottle, so I’m just going to drop it. Besides, there’s another bottle on the grass over there.”

“I don’t want to have to walk across the parking lot to throw my fast food trash away, so I’m just going to leave it next to my car. People get paid to clean this stuff up, right? I’m not littering, I’m giving someone a job.”

“I’m not walking another 40 feet to put this shopping cart in a rack. I’m just going to leave it in this parking space. Look at all the other carts in the parking lot. I’m sure someone will take care of it.”

“This thing I found doesn’t belong to me, but it’s kind of nice and I don’t want some thief to take it. So I’m going to.”

When you do things that you don’t like others to do — or wouldn’t want someone to do to you — you set an example for even more people to follow.

Always do the things you want to see more of in the world, not less.

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Related:

Accentuate the positive

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Every day you have the power to bring out the best in people simply by sincerely highlighting those things you appreciate about them the most.

Whatever you focus on grows stronger. When you focus on those things you enjoy most about people (and life in general), you not only encourage more of the types of behaviors you like to see in others, you attract more of these types of things into your life.

The same is true when you look for the negative. Not only will you find it, you’ll magnify it.

This is why it’s important to be very deliberate with what you choose to focus on, because it is extremely easy to leapfrog from one negative thing to another until you suddenly find yourself overwhelmed, depressed, or in despair.

This is not to say we should ignore problems — or those traits in others we don’t like — only that when we direct out attention to these things, we remain solution-oriented, not problem focused.

Related:

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Originally published on: Feb 7, 2014 @ 15:41
Republished on: Jun 6, 2015 @ 14:41

How to be a Superhero in Real Life (Part 3)

In this series:

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How to be a Superhero in Real Life (Part 3) by Zero Dean

  • Live a life you’re proud of
  • Be open to new ideas
  • Share your enthusiasm
  • Respect your body
  • Try new things
  • Focus on what you can do, not on what you can’t
  • Let go of what you can’t control
  • Be solution oriented, not problem focused
  • Don’t let others dictate your sense of worth
  • Strive for progress, not perfection
  • Don’t be afraid of failing, be afraid of not trying
  • Focus on what you have, not on what you don’t
  • Forgive yourself & others
  • Let go of your emotional baggage
  • Act with confidence
  • Admit when you are wrong
  • Put things back where they belong
  • Spread hope
  • Make peace
  • Generate joy

Every day.

Related:

How to be a Superhero in Real Life (Part 2)

In this series:

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How to be a Superhero in Real Life (Part 2) by Zero Dean

  • Be patient with people
  • Lead by example
  • Be tolerant of others
  • Live with a purpose in mind
  • Treat people well, regardless of how you feel
  • Take personal responsibility for your actions & your life
  • Honor your commitments
  • Be brave
  • Appreciate differences
  • Be reliable
  • Be someone you respect and admire
  • Share
  • Let your actions be congruent with your words
  • Live without prejudice
  • Act as if what you do makes a difference
  • Be polite
  • Inspire others
  • Be humble
  • Honor your relationships
  • Be compassionate

Every day.

Related:

How to be a Superhero in Real Life (Part 1)

In this series:

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How to be a Superhero in Real Life (Part 1) by Zero Dean

  • Encourage others
  • Be the change you wish to see
  • Give without expectation
  • Observe without judging
  • Be authentic & genuine
  • Clean up your own messes
  • Be upfront & honest
  • Give thanks & be sincere
  • Be kind
  • Appreciate without comparing
  • Live with intention
  • Take the time to truly listen to people
  • Pursue excellence
  • Strive to add value wherever you may be
  • Smile sincerely & generously
  • Offer to help without waiting to be asked
  • Treat people with respect & dignity
  • Do what you know is right, even when no one is watching
  • Keep your word
  • Live with integrity & honor

Every day.

Related:

Your life is a Do It Yourself project.

Your life is a Do It Yourself project.

Your life is a Do It Yourself project.

But if you’re lucky and you’re kind, you might just find a few people who will be more than willing to help you along the way.

Because you would do the same for them.

Related:

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We are surrounded

CONTENT ADVISORY: This blog post is a major change-of-pace from my usual fare and also contains strong language. Many people have applauded this post, but you may find it a turn off — and that’s fine.

It is complete bullshit that inauthentic assholes without an ounce of integrity keep rising, while others who try to do right are left to struggle.

I am so tired of seeing douchebags in the news and on the cover of magazines. I am tired of seeing people get famous for being narcissistic assholes.

I am tired of having my privacy violated from all directions as if it is for my own good.

I am tired of seeing the rich get richer and crooks get rewarded with bonuses.

Steal a fountain drink and go to jail. Rob millions of people of billions of dollars and get a bonus at the end of the year.

Get caught smoking crack, even McDonalds would fire you. But if you’re a high-ranking member of the government — where it is your job to be a responsible and trustworthy extension of the voice of the people? No problem. “Everyone makes mistakes.”

I am tired of seeing others get rewarded for cheating the system and playing into people’s fears or making promises they cannot or do not keep.

I am tired of “12 ways to get…”, “3 simple things you can do to…” and “Try this one simple trick…”

This is just manipulative and it’s over-the-top ridiculous.

We are surrounded by bullshit.

Why do we keep buying into it? Why do we keep rewarding the people and companies who do this?

There are so many truly good, truly talented people in the world who are truly worthy of promotion, and yet I need to see the fact that one of my friends “likes” that the (cancer-causing) McRib is back at McDonalds while others promoting health, kindness, love, and integrity starve for exposure?

Fuck.that.shit.

Go seek out someone who hasn’t sold out.
Go seek out someone who appears authentic.
Go seek out someone who doesn’t manipulate people.
Go seek out someone who could use the exposure.

Go HELP THEM. Not the people or companies who sit back and manipulate you and keep getting away with it.

Stop rewarding the people and companies who abuse and take advantage of you.
Stop letting your life be dictated by a box or a product.
Stop letting people convince you that you need things you don’t. That you will be happier with more. You won’t.
Stop wasting your time following someone else’s idea of the ideal life.

Focus on your health and well-being.
Focus on becoming a better person.
Focus on finding ways to make a positive difference in the world.
Focus on finding truly positive role-models and heroes.

You have exactly one life to live to do everything you ever wanted. Stop wasting it caught up in things that don’t matter.

Seriously.

The following comic (XKCD 137) supplements this post nicely:

XKCD 137

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Supplemental Reading: