“Can’t.” You keep using this word.

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“Can’t”. You keep using this word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

*Inspired by The Princess Bride

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Achieving personal goals: Be patient and disciplined

Achieving personal goals: patient and disciplined

Be patient. Think long term and stop seeking immediate gratification or shortcuts. Small changes add up to big changes over time. Strive for progress, not perfection.

What you want MOST is often far more important than what you want NOW — especially after the moment of desire passes. Repeatedly exercising your control over the urges or bad habits that are working against you helps provide you with a certain mental toughness. Over time, things you used to think were difficult become much easier.

Achieving personal goals series:

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Achieving personal goals: Comparison is the thief of joy

Achieving personal goals: Comparison is the thief of joy

We are often unaware of the struggles that others must face in order to achieve success. As Lee Honda put it, “Success is 99% failure.”

Know that whatever it is you wish to accomplish, no two people, businesses, or ventures are exactly the same. You can’t help but bring a unique perspective to your endeavors and a unique combination of talents and skills.

So even if the field is crowded, understand that you can succeed, too, but in order to do so, it is essential that you put in the effort and take action to achieve your goals.

Getting discouraged at others’ accomplishments and giving up because you feel you can’t compete gets you nowhere.

Constantly comparing yourself to others is waste of energy. There will always be someone better at something than you are.

A wise person once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” Don’t let the success of others discourage you from your own endeavors or make you bitter. If someone has done or is doing something you would like to do, let it inspire you and be an indicator that you, too, can achieve great things.

View the image version of this bullet point.

Achieving personal goals series:

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If you want something extraordinary

Excerpt from: Fearing change is counter productive.

Extraordinary doesn’t just happen. If you want something “spectacular” or “extraordinary” — you either have to make it happen, go out and get it, or let it into your life when it knocks on the door. If it feels the same and looks the same as everything else, it’s not extraordinary.

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Life is hard enough already

Life is hard enough already without blaming yourself for things that are beyond your control. And even when things are within your control, we all make mistakes — it is an essential part of being human — it’s how we learn.

Mistakes happen and there’s no stopping them. “Live and learn” is the best we can do. You can’t change the past, you can only affect the future by resolving to do better next time.

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Life is hard enough already.

Dear Self, I am working on being a better person

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Dear Self,

I am working on being a better person.

Please let me be the type of person who I would respect & admire if I saw them in action. Let me greet each new day as another opportunity to get things right. Let me be open to thinking about things in ways I haven’t thought about them before. Let me find ways to make a positive difference in the world, no matter how small, and act upon them when I am able.

Let me be open to the challenge of change. Let me not shy away from things just because they are difficult. Let me face my fears and do things I would like to do even when they make me nervous. Let me be generous with what I have to give away. Let me remember to be grateful for every second that I get to make choices in my life and act upon them.

Let me make at least one person’s day brighter by having been a part of it. Let me accept my mistakes as learning experiences. Let me learn to love myself, flaws and all. Let me not care so much what others think. And let me be confident in my ability to succeed.

Thank you. — Me

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The biggest theme park in the world.

Earth is simply the world’s biggest theme park and everyone you know is there. Enjoy it.

It’s just a way to view life. No one said it didn’t come with challenges. But you go to an amusement park to play, have a good time, enjoy the rides, and see as much of it as possible. Life should be no different.

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Above originally inspired by:

Life. It’s like waking up inside the biggest theme park in the world everyday and everyone you know is there. I love this ride I’m on.

It’s all there for you if you want it.

It's all there for you if you want it.

Sometimes work sucks, relationships suck and we find ourselves feeling down as a result of thinking about all the things that aren’t as we wish them to be in our lives.

At times like this it is important to remember that energy flows where attention goes. In essence, whatever one focuses on grows stronger. This can be to one’s benefit or detriment depending on where one places their attention.

If you truly desire a positive change in your life, then focus on what actions you’ll take to change things for the better — don’t dwell on what isn’t going well.

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"Whatever you focus on only grows stronger..."

Who are you going to be this year?

Who are you going to be this year?
I’ve seen a lot of posts on social networks this morning basically saying “Good riddance to the last year!” and how it was a “crappy” year.

A crappy year?

While the past 365 days may have been challenging in many ways, I think it’s important to remember that it is our attitude that helps dictate how we feel about what’s going on in our lives. And if we’re alive, with a roof over our heads, a meal to eat, and still able to make decisions in our lives, then we actually have it pretty good. A large part of the world doesn’t — and our lives, no matter how difficult they may get at times, often beat the alternatives.

Life isn’t always easy — but it helps if you remember that obstacles in your path are there to test you and to help you grow. It is by overcoming obstacles that you develop new skills and new ways of handling what the rest of your life has in store for you. If you’d never had a problem in your life, you wouldn’t be very able to deal with — well LIFE, would you?

“Smooth seas don’t make skilled sailors.” — African Proverb

I don’t know (many) adults who still cry when they drop their ice-cream cones.

“Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude.” — Zig Ziglar

Every year from the year we were born, our challenges change to reflect what’s going on in our lives (and the world). And they often increase in difficulty as we continue to evolve from one year to the next. Some things are within our control to change — other things are not — but what we always have control over is our attitude.

Many of the challenges we face in our teens are often not the same as when we are in our 20’s, 30’s and beyond. And while much of this can certainly be attributed to changes in our environment, careers & social status, at least some of it can be attributed to the life skills we’ve (hopefully) picked up along the way: Confidence, communication, organization, responsibility, and the ability to weather storms. We learn how to cope.

I think the movie Stepbrothers, which involves two 39 year old “children” still living at home, highlights an issue with not having learned the skills necessary to push forward into the next phases of life…

Warning: Profanity

If you want to be the very best you can be, then realize that challenges and contrast are a good thing and an opportunity for growth. And it is how you choose to react to those challenges that allows you to build your character and become a stronger person. Challenges are always an opportunity to reveal who you really are.

You don’t have to let the little things get you down — you don’t even have to let the big things get you down. Others may still complain about how awful or unfair or difficult life is, but you don’t have to be like that. Rather than focus on your problems, you can focus on how you’re going to overcome those problems — and have confidence that you’ll be able to do so.

Yes, it can certainly help to have a friend to confide in, vent to, or discuss your burden(s) — but it also helps to focus on what you’re going to do to overcome those burdens.

Which would you rather listen to:

  • 1) a friend complain about how awful something in their life is or
  • 2) the same friend explain something they’re dealing with and how they’re going to overcome it.

In the case of 2, they may even admit that they don’t know what they’re going to do, but if they explain their issues and express the fact they know that they will somehow find a way through them, it changes the entire tone of the conversation.

It’s the difference between “This is hard and life sucks!” and “This is hard, but I will get through this.” is a big one.

See also: The problem with problems

Would you rather the attention you receive be from people expressing how they “feel sorry” for you or would you rather the attention you receive from people be how they respect your attitude and ability to cope with what you’re dealing with.

You can decide right now that no matter what the next year has in store for you, that you are up to the challenge of handling everything to the best of your ability — and in the most positive way possible.

“I think the thing to do is to enjoy the ride while you’re on it.” — Johnny Depp

Yes, mistakes will be made — as they almost always are anytime we encounter something new — but every mistake is also a learning experience. It is by developing the skills needed to overcome challenges that help us show who we really are.

So who are you going to be?

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