It’s not because you don’t make mistakes. We all do. That’s how we learn. It’s not because you haven’t occasionally come across in a way you didn’t intend. We all do that, too. It’s not because you’re always friendly, always generous, or always think of others before yourself.
The fact is, we’re all a work-in-progress and no one is perfect.
The reason I think you’re awesome is because of what I know you are capable of.
I know how you can make someone’s day simply by showing them appreciation.
I know how you can change a life by offering friendly advice and encouragement.
I know how you can improve upon the things you want to work on just by making them more of a priority in your life.
Perhaps it’s your fitness, your diet, or your relationships.
Perhaps it’s all three.
I know there is an incredibly powerful person in you capable of achieving far more than you ever thought possible. A person who, by striving to add just a little more positivity and kindness to the world each day, motivates and inspires others to do the same.
They will share inspirational quotes and motivational images like nobody’s business. They will root for the underdog in movies. They will tell you that “Freedom lies in being bold!“, “Go for it!” and “Just do it!”
And so you set forth to try.
And then it starts.
Because what they really meant was anyone but you.
Because you’re a nobody and you’re not what they had in mind. And you’re doing it all wrong.
“Everything tells me that I am about to make a wrong decision, but making mistakes is just part of life. What does the world want of me? Does it want me to take no risks, to go back to where I came from because I didn’t have the courage to say “yes” to life?” — Paulo Coelho
They will ridicule you for trying to climb. They will call you egotistical for sticking your neck out. They will say you’re not different. There’s nothing special about you. And “it’s been done”.
At the same time they tell you that you lack originality, you will be mocked for breaking the rules. Bucking the status quo. Being weird. Unconventional. And trying new things.
They will make quick snap judgements about your character without hesitation. “You’re just looking for attention.” “What a show off.” “Narcissist!” “Glory hound!” You’re a hack. Arrogant, too. You just think you’re better than everyone else.
They will seek to discourage you. “Why are you even trying?”, “You can’t escape the system.” You’re just a loser. Doomed to fail. And whatever it is you seek, you don’t deserve it anyway.
But remember this:
They will misread your intentions, your actions, and your words. They will try to tell you why you are doing what you’re doing — as if they have more insight into what you’re trying to do than you do.
And they will be wrong.
But it doesn’t matter.
Because you’re not doing it for them. You’re doing it for you. And whatever your reasons may be, you don’t have to explain or justify yourself unless you want to. What matters most is simply deciding what you want to do, and then setting forth to do it.
So just treat people well, be as good a person as you can be along the way, and don’t let the naysayers get you down.
“Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.” – Dennis Wholey
They don’t really think about you as much as you think they do anyway. And when it really comes down to it, why would you care so much about what other people think about you when they don’t provide you with the same consideration?
And while I do agree that “Follow your passion” may be considered “bad career advice” if one chooses to follow it without any bit of common sense — or to follow it without any regard to all the other factors necessary to make a career “successful” — being successful in one’s life can mean any number of different things to different people.
Some people consider their careers successful when they make X amount of money per year. Others measure their success by how many people they are in charge of, or how broad a territory they cover, or how many stores they own. Others aim to leave a legacy behind.
And then there are others still, who consider themselves successful if they are simply able to pursue what they are most passionate about in life while making just enough money to meet their basic needs to afford them the luxury of doing more of what they love.
Alan Watts poses the question (in this video), “What would you like to do if money were no object? How would you really enjoy spending your life?” because to do anything other than that sets you up to, “Spend your life completely wasting your time. You’ll be doing things you don’t like doing in order to go on living, that is to go on doing things you don’t like doing, which is stupid. Better to have a short life that is full of what you like doing than a long life spent in a miserable way.”
I think he makes a very good point. The alternative to not pursuing your passion is to spend a life following a vicious cycle of doing things you don’t want to do to make a living doing things you don’t want to do.
“Instead of wondering when your next vacation is, maybe you should set up a life you don’t need to escape from.” — Seth Godin
“Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement. In a culture that relentlessly promotes avarice and excess as the good life, a person happy doing his own work is usually considered an eccentric, if not a subversive. Ambition is only understood if it’s to rise to the top of some imaginary ladder of success. Someone who takes an undemanding job because it affords him the time to pursue other interests and activities is considered a flake. A person who abandons a career in order to stay home and raise children is considered not to be living up to his potential — as if a job title and salary are the sole measure of human worth.
You’ll be told in a hundred ways, some subtle and some not, to keep climbing, and never be satisfied with where you are, who you are, and what you’re doing. There are a million ways to sell yourself out, and I guarantee you’ll hear about them.
To invent your own life’s meaning is not easy, but it’s still allowed, and I think you’ll be happier for the trouble.” – Bill Watterson
As such, I don’t think “Follow your passion” is bad career advice at all. And if one is simply looking for a problem with it, as the Huffington Post appears to be, then I would say that problem — if you can call it that — is simply this:
It isn’t complete career advice. It’s only a single step in a larger process.
Step 1, of course, is to discover what it is you are passionate about.
This isn’t necessarily as simple as it sounds. There may be many things you like to do, but nothing that you are particularly passionate about. There is a big difference between simply enjoying something and being so into it at times that doing anything else feels like a distraction. Eating, sleeping, bathing? They can wait!
While a rare few know exactly what they want to do from a very early age, most don’t discover the things we are truly passionate about until they stumble upon them. And then, whatever it may be, the process of doing it becomes enthralling.
“Many people fail to find their passion because they either fail to search methodically or search persistently. Some will simply not commit the time and energy to a search that can often be frustrating. In fact, they want their “destiny” to find them; they do not want to find it themselves. You cannot find your passion idly staring into space, hoping for it to appear as a revelation, from one book, article, blog posting or casual conversation.” — Larry Smith
Discovering what you are truly passionate about is important is because people who truly love what they do tend to want to do it to the best of their ability and continually find ways to improve — all the while enjoying the process.
“Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do.” — Steve Jobs
“Doing what you love is as important as ever, but if you’re going to make a living at it, it helps to find a niche where money flows as a regular consequence of the success of your idea. Loving what you do is almost as important as doing what you love, especially if you need to make a living at it. Go find a job you can commit to, a career or a business you can fall in love with.” — Seth Godin
Neil deGrasse Tyson and Neil Gaiman Describe Vision & Brilliance
“If everyone had the luxury to pursue a life of exactly what they love, we would all be ranked as visionary and brilliant. … If you got to spend every day of your life doing what you love, you can’t help but be the best in the world at that. And you get to smile every day for doing so. And you’ll be working at it almost to the exclusion of personal hygiene, and your friends are knocking on your door, saying, “Don’t you need a vacation?!,” and you don’t even know what the word “vacation” means because what you’re doing is what you want to do and a vacation from that is anything but a vacation — that’s the state of mind of somebody who’s doing what others might call visionary and brilliant.” — Neil deGrasse Tyson
To believe in yourself is to disconnect from need for positive feedback — or approval — from others as the justification and drive for whatever it is you wish to accomplish.
You have to have such a strong faith in yourself, your abilities, or your idea(s) that you are able to sustain the effort — and maintain the enthusiasm — necessary to succeed, even when you are inevitably presented with challenges along the way.
You need to learn to be the source of your own strength and encouragement. Because if you don’t have a deep down belief in yourself and a confidence in your ability to overcome any obstacles along your path, why will anyone else?
It starts with you. And you can do it.
But you don’t need me to tell you that — because deep down, you already know it.
Once upon a time, I used to post things and judge their value by likes and shares. And if something didn’t get many of either, I’d think, “Oh well.”
Then one day I posted something that barely made a blip. But instead of likes or shares, I received an email that said:
“Thank you. I really needed that today.”
And so it has happened in a similar fashion — via email or comments — a number of times since then.
And that’s how I discovered the real value in connecting with people. And it has much less to do with likes and shares than it does with creating meaningful moments in others’ lives, even if only one at a time.
With that in mind, let me offer two thoughts for your consideration:
1.You may never know who your actions, words, or creations inspire, but those who appreciate these things you offer to the world are out there, even if they are not always visible to you.
For every person who takes the time to acknowledge the value in what you have to offer, there will always be others who won’t. The lack of acknowledgement does not make what you offer any less valuable — especially if you already believe in and see the value in it (and it is important that you do).
2.Never hesitate to express thanks — or send a kind word — to those who touch you in a meaningful way — be it through their actions, words, or works of art.
Because you also never know how your own gratitude becomes the fuel that touches and inspires those who touch and inspire you.
If you’re reading this, you have my thanks. It is a pleasure to connect with you, whether we do it often — or make a show of it — or not.