Insecurity is a spotlight. The more insecure you are about something the more visible it becomes to others. Conversely, the more comfortable you are with something the less people tend to notice it (or care).
Day: April 25, 2019
Resist the urge to always explain yourself
The fact is – for any number of reasons that are often beyond our control – people don’t always see us in the same way we see ourselves.
While it’s natural to care about how you are perceived, it is an exercise in futility to try to explain yourself or justify your actions to everyone who doesn’t get you. Not only is this often a waste of time, it will likely make you seem insecure on top of everything else.
People will often draw conclusions about others based on what they imagine or guess to be true rather than what actually is. They may even presume to know what motivates a person or declare with confidence that they know why that person took a specific course of action. When, in fact, these conclusions can paint a picture that doesn’t at all reflect reality. And that’s OK.
It is perfectly acceptable to ignore the fact that other people have the wrong impression of you. Because, with few exceptions, what other people think about you will have absolutely no impact on your life unless you choose to let it.
When you truly know who you are, it won’t matter so much that other people don’t. What matters is focusing on who you want to be and what you wish to accomplish with your life regardless of those who don’t get you, what you’re doing, or what you wish to do.
It is not your job
If someone who doesn’t know you has an inaccurate perception of who you are, it is not your job to correct them.
In some situations, explaining yourself may be helpful, but the occasions when people who could not care less about you make misinformed, misguided, or snap judgements about you are rarely those times.