October 20, 2014 - Zero Dean

Always remember that your actions help influence whether there is more or less of something in the world.

The reason why bad news, people acting badly, and superficial pop culture is so popular is because people give their attention to it. This, in turn, creates more of exactly the sorts of things people say they don’t want.

This is why it is so important to encourage those who are doing the sorts of things you would like to see more of.

If you like it, encourage it. If you admire it, say so. If you appreciate it, express it.

It doesn’t matter if it’s a friend, a family member, a stranger on the street, or someone you cross paths with online, everyone can always use a little encouragement and positive feedback. Your recognition of the things you appreciate helps to prolong those things and ensure their future existence. Ten seconds of your time is all it takes (although thirty or more is more meaningful).

In a world of takers, be someone who gives back.

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Originally published on: Oct 20, 2014

“The only reason why we ask other people how their weekend was is so we can tell them about our own weekend.”

Another false meme.

This one is a quote from Chuck Palahniuk’s book, Invisible Monsters.

I’m not sure of the context within the book. I don’t know if it’s a character saying it or the author, but it’s being shared on the Web in meme form as if it’s an insightful piece of self-contained wisdom.

At best, it’s a very cynical view of the world.

cyn·i·cal
1. believing that people are motivated by self-interest; distrustful of human sincerity or integrity.
2. concerned only with one’s own interests and typically disregarding accepted or appropriate standards in order to achieve them.

It should go without saying that there are numerous valid reasons why someone might ask you how your weekend was, not least of which being they are genuinely interested.

Not everyone has a personal agenda. Not everyone is superficial, self-centered, or selfish. Not everyone provides a courtesy or kindness with the expectation of reward.

Some people are actually interested in what others have to say or offer. And it has nothing to do with having a hidden agenda. It has to do with being a supportive friend, a good listener, or even just a curious person.

It’s not about manipulation or acting under false pretense.

Sometimes communication is one-sided, sometimes it’s not. Sometimes you talk. Sometimes you listen. That’s just how it works.

But true friendship and connection involves sharing an experience — without an agenda.

And there are far more people in the world happy to do that than this cynical quote would lead you to believe.

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